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Letting Go of Evangelion

Around a week ago now, I watched Evangelion 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon a Time , or Shin Evangelion , with my father in IMAX. It wasn't the first time I've seen it, and it won't be the last. To prepare for the film, I watched the original classic Neon Genesis Evangelion , as well as End of Evangelion , and the three other "Rebuild" films: 1.0 You Are (Not) Alone, 2.0 You Can (Not) Advance, and 3.0 You Can (Not) Redo, in their respective 1.11, 2.22, and 3.33  states, all with my father watching with me. It's the third time I've rewatched the original series, the fifth time I've rewatched End of Eva, and the second time I've rewatched the Rebuilds, minus 3.0+1.0. Every time, I took away something new, something that didn't resonate with me the last time I experienced the work. Like a guitar, playing a new chord caused a string that I haven't heard before to ring in resonance. The string that played this time was the idea of  changing the world, and m
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Hello Charlotte and Conversations, Lectures and Invitations

I don't understand why I love Hello Charlotte. Not in traditional terms, anyways.  Most of my favorite stories have elements that I can easily understand as to why I fell in love with those stories in the first place. Evangelion and loneliness, Fata Morgana and empathy, Subahibi and subjective reality, Omori and forgiveness. With Hello Charlotte, it's not that easy for me anymore, and I don't really understand why. And I don't really understand why I don't understand. It's not especially subtle with it's themes, I feel like I understand what etherane was trying to say, and what feelings she was trying to impart onto me. I feel like I mostly understand the narrative, in a way that left me satisfied. In every respect, I should feel satisfied moving on from this work. I can't though. That's what I'm trying to figure out. Why am I so fixated on this story? I've been thinking, and I think it's because it's more than the sum of it's par
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I Miss Dark Souls (Or, My Thoughts on Elden Ring)

I miss Dark Souls. That is the thought that crossed my mind when I felled Malenia, Goddess of Rot. After that moment, there was a single feeling that washed over me: exhaustion. I was exhausted of playing Elden Ring. Thoroughly and viciously, I was utterly exhausted.  To be upfront about it, I have quite a love-hate relationship with Elden Ring. Sometimes, I hate it. I wonder how some of the stupendously idiotic decisions and enemies and encounters even made it past initial conceptualization. Other times, I am in love with it. I cannot fathom how what I'm seeing was dreamt by a human mind, how it coalesced into something so incredible. Mostly? It's both. There was rarely ever a time I felt indifferent to it. I have no idea where to start when talking about this game. I have tried to put my thoughts into words three times so far, and all of those times they completely failed to convey my feelings. I think it comes down to one thing: I am saddened by this game. I am not angry at
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